From deep in the quiet, Love knocked on the door
of the heart I’d been wanting to set free to soar.
Apprehension aside, I chose Love within,
to trust my own heart as authority again.
It was scary to trust (I’d been hurt so much!)
But defenses melted in the light of Love’s touch.
Self-confidence grew, day by day . . .
The bulwark I’d constructed began breaking away,
and as it did, I came to discover
both demons and gold I had put undercover.
Out into Love’s light came those parts of my being
I’d staunchly protected anyone from seeing:
my hopes, my needs, the depth of my feeling,
my secrets and fears, all came up for healing.
Expansion continued, Love pervaded the depths;
each dusty crevice uncovered, then swept.
I confronted the fears; Mind put up a fight.
But none matched the Power – the Power of Light.
As fears dissolved, the Beauty emerged.
The Beauty of my Truth, too long submerged,
came forth with a vengeance, determined to live!
(Oh! Who could have known I’d have SO much to give?)
Not until I was ready – ready to see –
could I possibly know of the Beauty in me . . .
But Love knew, and constantly urged me to look,
steadfast and unfailing with each step that I took,
guiding me through every thought, every feeling,
from the floor of my Will to the top of its ceiling.
Distortions exposed, illusions dispelled,
by the sword of discernment, each fear-thought was felled,
‘til Beauty’d been given enough room to grow.
And then, in that moment, I came to KNOW
what Love had been saying to me from the start:
“Let go! Choose Trust –Trust in your Heart!!”
So I did! I re-opened, acknowledged my worth;
and as I did, my Beauty sprang forth!
Angels were singing! They rallied around!
And speaking through me? Heart’s authentic sound!
I conquered the demons; I said no to fear.
I embraced the joys and delights I hold dear.
In the light of self love, strength was felt.
I found my Source. I found . . . my Self.
From a small knock on the door, the fear paradigm died . . .
Now, my whole life’s ascending – choosing Heart as my guide.
Copyright ©2014 Z Lu Alexander
After several frustrating, confusing decades, Alexander finally surrendered and accepted the fact that her “career” is her inner work. Through many changes in her outer life – downsizings, firings, deaths, moves and the loss of jobs, income, parents, sister, husband, extended family, long-lived dogs and cats, home, car, identities, friends and lover – her inner work never let up. The only thing constant, truly reliable and the creator of it all, abides inside her Heart. Ultimately, Alexander came to trust her Higher Power and to love and accept herself.